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Last night wasn’t a very good one. I went to bed at my normal time like I always do. After finishing my math homework I laid in bed. I thought a bit while trying to fall asleep. As I was thinking, all the anger that has build up inside me came out. I sat up and pick up a Swiss Army Knife that I had lying around. I flipped open the smallest, but sharpest blade, and started to cut up the bottom of my forearm. I just couldn’t stop. My body was shaking, blood was coming out. As it got worse I dropped the knife and put the uncut arm’s hand on my forehead to try to stop my body from shacking. I didn’t care about my cut arm or the blood coming out. I laid my head down and tried to fall asleep. It didn’t work. My arm was still bleeding and hurting. The pain meant nothing. I didn’t get any sleep.

My dad opened my door at the usual time to tell me to get in the shower. My arm was hidden from view. I got up and got in the shower. I’m not letting my parents find out. They don’t need to know. It is my problem and I will deal with it. Just thinking of what I did makes me shake. I’m not a happy person. I’m just a person with lots of anger build up inside ready to escape. I may seem happy to friends. It helps me not go completely insane over the anger. I have to fix this on my own.


One Comment

    • Adam "NeuralCord" Qaisar
    • Posted January 6, 2005 at 11:02 am
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    • Reply

    Ok, you need some help – and I mean that in a good way, go see your Doctor or someone you trust to talk to.

    Also, if you have cut yourself, your parents will find out. It might seem like something manageable right now, and something you think you can control, but it will grow, the cuts will get bigger, and the harm will escalate until it reaches a final, fatal point – and personally I don’t want that point to be reached.

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